Showing posts with label sadness. Show all posts
Showing posts with label sadness. Show all posts

Friday, December 2, 2011

Not that anybody cares

...and just so you know that I'm not dead!
I'm alive! Well, if you could say so; I've been devoting ALL of my time to University, homework, some University projects, finals and my Thesis. I have no life anymore, no time to hang out with friends, no time to read, no time to draw... Hell, not even time to imagine! (Not that the inspiration is here anymore, anyway... ).
All I ever want to do these days is crawl into bed and hide, I don't want to talk to anybody, nor even think anymore.
Damn, it's now 4am and I'm still awake working on some stupid project I don't really care about to begin with. I'm upset and moody and will growl at anybody who dares aproaching me right now.

...Can't I just cry to sleep and wake up some day when my life is not this upsetting anymore and I love everything about it?
I hate everything and everyone and blaaaaarrrrgggghhhhhhh

Can you see how much of a cry-baby/angsty teen I have become in these past months...?
IDIOTICALLY ANNOYING, I KNOW.

Tuesday, October 25, 2011

Most unfortunately,

As you may have already guessed, it was my birthday (on the 23rd), and I still can't believe how I still have not actually done anything with my life. All I have ever done is study. For 22 years, study hard. To please others.
All I want to do is to paint and to write and to create.
Now, as every day passes by, I can't help but feel as such a worthless uncertainty.



I don't know anymore.

Wednesday, October 12, 2011

Trying to write Thesis Protocol


SOMEONE-KILL-ME-ALREADY-PLEASE
; n ;

Friday, March 4, 2011

Breaking News: Trouble in Paradise

At the risk of sounding like a shallow devotchka for using the title above to discuss a fashion related subject, instead of one of the more important current world issues, let me apologize in advance; but the very important news tormenting yours truly today: Herr John Galliano. More specifically, his sad departure from Dior. More sadly, it wasn't precisely a "departure" , but more of a "YOU ARE FIRED" situation.

The man in question, Herr John Galliano, dearest

I am sure you have already heard about the whole Galliano's Anti-Semitic Scandal? If you have not, the story goes like this:

-Herr Galliano is accused of making some shameful anti-semitic comments at La Perle bar in Paris, as well as verbally abusing a couple nearby.


-Dior decides to suspend Herr Galliano from his responsibilities with the company. Dior chief executive Sidney Toledano says: "Dior affirms with the utmost conviction its policy of zero tolerance towards any anti-semitic or racist words or behaviour". This is when I thought: DAMN, you better not have said that, my most admired Galliano...!

-Sadly, and most terribly, it's Official; he DID said it! And you can read all about it right here. OR anywhere you w
ant, because it's already EVERYWHERE. There's even an infamous video featuring a drunk Galliano ranting against jews. And so, it's done, Herr John Galliano is fired from Christian Dior. Now, as much as I adore Herr Galliano's work, I must admit Dior handled things the very best way, they immediately took charge and made the (wether I want to accept/admit it or not) right decision since that was a trully shameful behavior from Herr Galliano ( ; n ; ).

NOOOOOOONONONONONONOOOOOOOOT GALLIANO ; n ;

This was a very unfortunate incident; I'm still quite astonished by some of the things said, I mean, it never would have occured to me that Herr Galliano would even have those kinds of views, specially when he had always seemed to be very open about acceptance of diversity, as well as a respectful, tolerant person. And, while I may not agree with many of the ideas of judaism, nor even manage to understand their points of view, I still respect them, because someone having a different mentality or ideas from what I think is right, does not give me, nor any of us the right to degrade nor hate upon others. Sigh.

Even so, I still deeply admire Herr Galliano as the artist he is. As much as I can't support his rude opinions, I still hope this experience will become more of a chance to change for him, to make up for his mistakes, learn something important from all of this and become a better person. Hopefully, he will manage to rebirth from his ashes and take over the Haute Couture world once again. WELL, if comes to "hoping" and "desiring" I must say, I still helplessly HOPE that all of this was a big, gigantic missunderstanding, and the person in that video is not Herr Galliano, but his unknown evil twin or something...! \(´Д`*\ ) ...... After all, one can dare to dream, right??? Hmmmmmmmmmm.......
*Hopeless sigh*

At least I know I will always admire his gorgeous past work and his influence on the fashion world. I mean, the man was an absolute genious! Despite of his shameful behaviour, one can't just deny that fact; I mean, you can't just "throw his talent under a rug" or something. I remember he was the main reason I even became interested in fashion; I had always perceived fashion as a shallow, empty industry, but it was Herr Galliano's work what trully intrigued me and made me realize how mistaken I was: fashion is a form of art. It allows ideas to become embodied into gorgeous garments; you can express yourself through fashion. Every single garment becomes a master piece, the culmination of an artist's hardwork. Herr Galliano's work showed me that. That is why I will forever deeply admire him as an artist, as well as his beautiful artwork. But enough talk (I think you, dearest of readers may already be thinking the same) and allow me to show you what the fuzz is all about, yes? I think it will be better to remember him by his artwork, rather than by these regretable events.


^Christian Dior Fall 2009Couture^
You can absolutely feel Herr Galliano's passion and fervor for his beautiful artwork

^Christian Dior Spring 2010 Couture^


^Christian Dior Spring 2011 Couture^
A breath-taking collection. One masterpiece after the other

^Christian Dior Fall 2010 RTW^
Even the so-called RTW Collections were dashingly stunning! Such a thoughtful collection: graceful and beautifully structured; the fitting is really flattering, each silhouette: a beautiful one of a kind.

^John Galliano Fall 2009 RTW^
This is my most favorite collection. Everything about it is absolutely gorgeous and perfect. All of the models look like precious deities. Without any exaggerations, I can say this collection is absolute perfection; all gorgeousness and gorgeousity taken a corporeal form
; u ;


Thank you, Galliano, sir, for all of the beautiful works of art you showed to the world, I hope you manage to get back in track again soon, learn from this unfortunate and become a better person... until next time! Peet all!


All pictures are from Style.com

Saturday, August 14, 2010

I don't want to go back there :c

; A ;
*Boohoo boohoohoo*
...................................................

...................................................
...................................................
.......... Yes, as you may have already guessed, I'm going back to college tomorrow ..........
It's my 7th semester, and I can only think of it as going down to the very 7th Circle of Hell.
...................................................
...................................................
...................................................
.......... Perhaps I should start seeing college as a Sacred Door to Knowledge, instead ..........

HRRMMM ..... RIGHT .....
...................................................








Wednesday, February 17, 2010

Bleeding Trees

I am sorry I am still sad.
I am sorry I am always down.
Did I put myself down like that?
Perhaps I never noticed how pathetic I trully was. Until I heard what I heard.
I don't like being this way.
I don't like being myself.
I wish I were better, and I wish I were worthy.
I am always sad. I am always apathetic.
I am always talking about myself.
I am sorry for this.
Please, excuse my stupidness.
Please, forgive my hunger for attention.